I have witnessed many heart breaks. My own was during college which made me stare for hours on a blank wall while classes were ongoing (“tulala at sabaw!”). For some of my loved ones, some wanted to just stay alone in her room for almost a week and worse for some who wanted to commit suicide! Notice my title, “Why YOUR relationships fail?” instead of “Why relationships fail?”. This is because I want you to focus in YOU. Your self is under your control and never will your partner be. So let us just focus on the things that we can control and see where you have done wrong at some point in your relationship.
1.You don’t realize your worth as a person
Knowing your worth as a person is a crucial factor to succeed in a relationship. And if you don’t value yourself, don’t expect the relationship to last long. You will tend to have your life revolve around your partner which won’t be sustainable and will suffocate him in the long run. You are just waiting for him to message you and answer your text messages right away. You get too clingy as a result. You just want him to be around all the time, and that sucks for your partner!
Tip: Realize that you are a unique, lovable and imperfectly beautiful individual. You are in the process of bettering yourself and you deserve to be loved and treated right. If you believe you are a good person, you know you deserve good things in life!
2.You don’t have a life!
You don’t have a life which results to you being painfully clingy. You don’t want him to go out with friends because you presume that going out with his buddies would mean that your importance is outweighed. Yes, you are two individuals who decide to enter in a relationship but this doesn’t mean that you lose your individuality or your own interests. Your partner may be very busy at work, but you just nag him when he comes home late. You might be guilty of those because you don’t have a life!
Tip: Of course, get a life, lovely lady! Your guy might have a car show to see but you don’t want to go with him because you want to go shopping for that leather bag! Let him go to that car show and you go shopping, girl! Give him the space and enjoy yours, too! Pursue your passion. Be good if not the best in your field. Enroll in that Yoga class nearby your office while you wait for him to pick you up. Attend seminars and workshops to have additional skills. Keep improving yourself! And then, you will realize that you are too busy to think why he did not message you! Surprisingly, you will attract him more into you if you do those things!
3.You don’t trust him
You get jealous too much because you don’t trust him. A little jealousy is cute, but it’s horrible if too much. You say that he played around before and so you can’t trust him. Is that your reasoning?
Tip: If you don’t and can’t trust him then don’t get into that relationship. As simple as it may sound, but it is really your decision to trust him or not. If you love him, give him that trust. It’s up to him if he breaks it. It’s not your loss if he does!
4.You don’t respect him
Sometimes, your strong personality makes you so stubborn that you don’t want to listen to him anymore. You do things very independently and you don’t ask for his opinions even. The important decisions to make as a couple are obviously need to be discussed.
Tip: Hear his side of the issue, respect his views on certain matters. Respect is as important as love. And every man wants to feel needed and respected. He would appreciate to see your fragility as a woman and give him the chance to be your knight in shining armour!
5.You don’t compromise
Women have the tendencies to want to be spoiled by their boyfriends or husbands. Of course, we all do! But sometimes, we go beyond the limit of demanding too much from them. We are getting too unreasonable at times that we demand like: “Honey, can you go to Greenbelt 3 to change the size of this blouse? Then please bring me matcha churros and drop it here in my office in Ortigas. My car is coding, I hope you could bring me home (in QC) before you go to your office (he’ll be on a night shift in BGC by the way!).
Tip: Girl, kindness is free, give it to him! He is your partner and not your uber driver to whom you can demand to go anywhere you want. Compromise. Don’t insist things just because you want to. You’ll never go wrong with kindness!
6.You fail to communicate
You expect that your man can read your mind. When you say NO (but you mean YES!) he get it as NO, darling! Communicate your thoughts to him. He can’t decipher what’s going on in your mind. When you become indifferent and you don’t want to discuss things that matter to you both, that will be the start of falling apart.
Tip: Learn to communicate. And learn to listen to him as well. Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship. Try as much as possible to discuss things calmly. Don’t react, but respond.
Some people you’ve met will give you a lesson, and some will be there to stay. If you know you gave your best in your relationship and still failed, don’t be regretful. Move on. God is preparing something better for you. Fight for the relationship if you know it is worth it. But learn to let go if you need to. Most importantly, pray for your “God’s Gift”.
Photo credits: Pinterest